Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Budge It

Do you guys have any idea what goes into putting together a real budget? Good nonsense, it's ridiculous. Eric and I spent two hours crunching numbers this evening, making our first goal just to break even, and our second goal to be able to afford a mortgage. My eyeballs feel burnt, and I think he may have developed an ulcer, but somehow we did it. Somehow, we cut our current expenses straight up IN HALF. If you want to applaud, I won't stop you.

The month of February will be the true test. If we can make it work, then we can start looking for a house. We will also be two of the most awesome people you will ever know, because we didn't just get blood from a stone. We cut that stone sucker open and lifted out its beating heart. It's enough to make a person want to cuss in joy. SUCK IT, Budget!!. Unh. **Chest bump!** RAWR!!!!!!!!!

Okay, so I'm getting ahead of myself. Right now we have a piece of paper with "+$10" written on the bottom, but we can't exactly take that to the bank and cash it. Unless this economy gets much worse, in which case, we might all be making up our own currencies soon. Personally, I think I'll go with boogers, as they seem to be an abundance in my house, as of late. "16 boogers in exchange for your piece of bread, and that's three broken paper clips change, thank you for doing business, my good sir."

Budgets are crazy animals though, and what looks good on paper today, may be grounds for some hilarious blog posts about shortsightedness and living in a fantasy land that result in starving children and busted dreams a month from now. Yes, hilarious. Wish us luck.


Katy said...

My advice is

1)Always round up, even if you number is $72.00, round to $80

2)Be realistic about entertainment expenses. Don't pinch yourself so tight that you'll be able to afford a home and never eat out or go see a movie or do a family activity that costs money. It's not worth it.

3)Have an emergency fund. i can't stress that one enough.

Scarlet said...

Funny I read this right after paying a few bills. I have seen all over Oprah how to cut your budget. I however don't really know how to cut mine. I don't go to Starbucks every day and I don't buy Prada purses only to let them sit in my closet with tags still on them. Oh and my mortgage company well they won't take phone calls so I don't know how to get them to work with me about possibly reworking my interest rate or something. So any advice about getting blood from a turnip is much appreciated. And I hope this works for you I would love to know a real person that can stick to a budget instead of those who live in TV land.

Renee said...

I used the Suze Ormand budget method, but modified it for people who live in the real world, with kids who need shoes a little more than parents who need a nine month's income emergency fund.

I'm so with you Scarlet. I was like," Latte Factor??? I don't even drink lattes, you idiot. We eat peanut butter and jelly every day and get our movies from the library, already."

I used to get so frustrated by the "money-saving tips" you read in magazines or see on Oprah. I've decided the best thing to do is just ignore them, because most of those people don't even need to save money anyway. They're just tight, so they can afford to buy/justify designer jeans and get their hair done by Rolf.

Scarlet said...

There was also once upon a time an article on MSN that was how to live on one income and the first step was when your mother dies and leaves you an inheritance pay off all your debt. I am happy to say that I would prefer my mom stay alive to being debt free but also I believe the inheritance in my family would be slim to nil.

Anonymous said...

You are so freakin' hilarious. SUCK IT, Budget!!. Unh. I don't think Budget has ever been talked to like that before.

I know a lot of people really make coupons work for them--they cut from the grocery store ads, then combine them with manufacturer's coupons on-line. It's kind of a career though. But maybe you could find a house coupon or something!

diane said...

Budgets suck. We are all broke. The end.

Dazed and Confused said...

Let me just say that yes, owning a house is a cool feeling, but not worrying about money day after day, month after month is MUCH better. The last house we owned was beautiful, and we thought that would make up for the tighter budget. After three years, it just became a gigantic weight on our shoulders. If it is tight, keep renting! It is just not worth it. And personally, I LOVE renting, if something breaks, I call the landlord (which is something else you need to have extra money socked away for -- plumbing, broken refrigerator, etc). Just my two cents worth.