Saturday, August 30, 2008

Look What Came In The Mail Today

Dear Renee,

You are not good at sarcasm. Please get that through your thick skull.

Also, paranoia does not look good on you. Holy crap. You just erased like, half of your posts. Why do you do stuff like that? It's not like you like deleted the bones of the next great American novel or anything, but there were some super cute pictures of your kids on here, and now you're kind of stuck with a lot of mediocre writing, which so cannot be supported by its own merit. You NEED that chubby baby boy.

I wish you'd stop acting like the world was out to get you. It's not. The world is not going to come knocking on your door to steal you and put your limbs in its freezer because you wrote a blog about your kid's birthday party. Your bipolar tendencies just serve to distance you from people who you don't let that close to begin with. Are you really that dead set on having no life?

I'm just going to say this one more time. You really need to get out more.

With Love,
Your Brain (the sane part)

P.S. I'm totally cool with you referring to the kids as L- and H- from now on. I just don't know if it's really going to make any difference in the end, since you'll probably have another Crazy Day and like, delete this whole thing anyway. You're a nut.


mrsmouthy said...

I totally worry about the same stuff, too. I really was freaked out when I publicly posted that my husband would be out of town for 2 days, so please come rape me and steal Rock Band while you're at it. My husband keeps reminding me, "You're not that important." Thanks, I guess.

Renee said...

I knew you'd understand. It's that whole, "Do I want this kind of attention?" debate all public bloggers have.

For what it's worth, I totally think you're important enough to rape... er... yeah.

diane said...

For the record, you are totally good at sarcasm and you are completely nuts. Definitely way paranoid and possibly schizophrenic. That's what makes you so cute and fuzzy.

Ern said...

What's the deuce blog?

Katy said...

where have you been?

mrsmouthy said...

This is an automated reminder sent out by the Internet President: Time to Post.