Miss America: Hi, I'm Lennon. My mom can't see so well, but that doesn't mean she doesn't like Target.
Yankee Doodie (because of the diaper) Dandy: YEAH! MOM!
Miss America: Sometimes my mom wishes she could just go to Target and be able to buy things like clothes that fit, and fresh bread, and glue sticks, but she can't. You know why? Because her Orientalation & Mobitee teacher said it wasn't safe.
Yankee Doodie Dandy: NO!
M. America: So my mom said, "Why not?" and you know what he said? He said because, even thought she lives within a ten minute walk of the place, she can't cross the street that gets her to Target, because the cars go through the lights too fast. So, like, the only thing standing between my mom and delicious Archer Farms brand Potato Soup for lunch and more pretty dresses made by Circo for me is a stupid street crossing.
Y.D.D.: Vroom Vroom!
Miss A: That's right! If only that street crossing were made safer for her travel, she could get all the things she wants and needs in one place! Easy peasy! But you know what? She wrote a letter, and then they wrote her back, and your know what they said?? Our town didn't BUDGET for an audible signal. So they want to know if she can raise some funds, so they can install something for her.
Miss A: No, not "no"! YES! We just need some ideas. Mom says Healthy Children With Strong Wills go for top dollar on the black market, but I'm thinking you guys might have some different ideas.
Yankee Doodie Dandy (clearing his throat): Although the Transportation Equity Act of the 21st Century, section 1202 directed that all new transportation plans shall "include the installation, where appropriate, and maintenance of audible traffic signals and audible signs and street crossings" and the Americans with Disabilities Act of 1990, Title II, implemented regulation that required accessibility of all facilities of the State and local governments, including defined sidewalks and street crossings, according to the 2004 court decision of Barden v. Sacramento, these rulings mean very little without the funds to back them up. In an effort to be proactive, it is in our immediate sights to obtain funds through grant-writing and fund-raising efforts which would cover the cost of the Accessible Pedestrian Signal (click link for more info) without financial burden placed solely on the local government.
Miss America: We think Daddy should put on a rock show and have people bring money. What do you think?
Mom: I really like Target.
DAMN THE MAN, SAVE THE EMPIRE!
(or if you're Lennon, just pretend to be a pony)