Thursday, August 12, 2010

What if I just shut up and let these two do the talking?



Miss America: Hi, I'm Lennon. My mom can't see so well, but that doesn't mean she doesn't like Target.

Yankee Doodie (because of the diaper) Dandy: YEAH! MOM!

Miss America: Sometimes my mom wishes she could just go to Target and be able to buy things like clothes that fit, and fresh bread, and glue sticks, but she can't. You know why? Because her Orientalation & Mobitee teacher said it wasn't safe.

Yankee Doodie Dandy: NO!

M. America: So my mom said, "Why not?" and you know what he said? He said because, even thought she lives within a ten minute walk of the place, she can't cross the street that gets her to Target, because the cars go through the lights too fast. So, like, the only thing standing between my mom and delicious Archer Farms brand Potato Soup for lunch and more pretty dresses made by Circo for me is a stupid street crossing.

Y.D.D.: Vroom Vroom!

Miss A: That's right! If only that street crossing were made safer for her travel, she could get all the things she wants and needs in one place! Easy peasy! But you know what? She wrote a letter, and then they wrote her back, and your know what they said?? Our town didn't BUDGET for an audible signal. So they want to know if she can raise some funds, so they can install something for her.

Y.D.D.: NO!

Miss A: No, not "no"! YES! We just need some ideas. Mom says Healthy Children With Strong Wills go for top dollar on the black market, but I'm thinking you guys might have some different ideas.

Yankee Doodie Dandy (clearing his throat): Although the Transportation Equity Act of the 21st Century, section 1202 directed that all new transportation plans shall "include the installation, where appropriate, and maintenance of audible traffic signals and audible signs and street crossings" and the Americans with Disabilities Act of 1990, Title II, implemented regulation that required accessibility of all facilities of the State and local governments, including defined sidewalks and street crossings, according to the 2004 court decision of Barden v. Sacramento, these rulings mean very little without the funds to back them up. In an effort to be proactive, it is in our immediate sights to obtain funds through grant-writing and fund-raising efforts which would cover the cost of the Accessible Pedestrian Signal (click link for more info) without financial burden placed solely on the local government.



Miss America: We think Daddy should put on a rock show and have people bring money. What do you think?

Mom: I really like Target.



DAMN THE MAN, SAVE THE EMPIRE!
(or if you're Lennon, just pretend to be a pony)

16 comments:

Renee said...

Just looking for some ideas on how to fund-raise. Have any of you done something like this before? I'm sort of stuck.

monika said...

no ideas just yet. I love seeing pics of L & H. so cute!

Rebecca Martin said...

There's always the old car wash idea. Pre-sell tickets so if people don't come you still get the money. Then there's restaurants that do fundraisers. They have a specific night where you get a portion of the profits. I'll keep thinking...

Kristin said...

I would write a letter to Target - they are big on the community do-gooding and if you wrote a letter about this issue that included how you would be able to get everything you need at Target if only you could cross the damn street, they might spring for it.

Evan H. said...

Love Kristins idea but think you could use your blog popularity too raise money online. Or one of us could get it going.

Evan H. said...

To not too

Cath said...

Costa vida does fundraising, so does chick-fil-a. Maybe Eric could put together a battle of the bands here in town and see if the town would donate the venue. I will keep my Lucy mind thinking....
In the mean time, I am ALWAYS looking for someone to go shopping with if you ever need a ride anywhere call me!

monika said...

oh Rubio's does some fund raising thing also, i think. I also I like Kristen's idea about writing Target.

mrsmouthy said...

Like, DUH, why hasn't anyone mentioned car washing?

Also, you could sell a kidney for up to 50,000 dollars, but not in the U.S. It's illegal here.

diane said...

Go with Kristin's idea, and Cathy's in the meantime.

mrsmouthy said...

I meant to write $500,000, if it changes anything. How much does an audible cross walk signal cost?

mrsmouthy said...

Damn it! Someone DID mention car wash! But no one's mentioned lemonade stand...

Heidi said...

I think you need to take this to the news. Local, national and international. Why not? I will call People magazine today and get a press release release to the Associated Press pronto. The fact that you cant cross a damn street is outrageous. Everyone needs to know and we need to make a big fucking deal about the whole thing. Did I mention I was your publicist?

Cassandra said...

Can I just say that I love this post? Especially Y.D.D.'s comments. :)

JMart said...

Sell your eyes with a no-money-back guarantee.

(and I have arrived at your blog)

Jason Centers said...

Wait. Did we cover how much this thing costs?