...is what you would say, if you weren't awesome.
Thanks for your patience, people. I have been wanting to write something for a while, but I couldn't think of a funny way to talk about how my kids hate my guts and my guts hate my life (it's an indigestion thing, and if I got into it, I'm guaranteed to lose at least six readers.) Needless to say, I am stressed out bigtime, in a way that makes me understand why the word "stressed" is used to describe stress. I feel like my force per unit area is beyond capacity, yo.
Harrison is being evaluated for speech delay on Monday. I think they'll say he's doing just fine, but I felt like not getting him tested could be irresponsible. Six-Eight words (varying levels of understandability) and approaching age 2 1/2. And he's losing language he once had. I know, I know, you have a nephew, grandson, boy-who-lived-in-your-apartment-complex, who didn't say a word until he was 3, and now he's a lawyer or Ryan Seacrest. I just need the test.
I have been interviewing librarians about their jobs. When you ask me why I want to be a librarian, it becomes very clear to me that you don't know many librarians. They are easily the coolest people on the planet. They are the David Lee Roth to my teenage-boy-in-the-80's-who-thinks-the-national-anthem-should-include-more-stuff-about-spandex-and-boobs. In other words, "You just don't get it." It has been seriously a THRILL talking about the stuff Librarians talk about. I want this career, I want this career, I want this career. P.S. the next person who tells me "Who needs a librarian in the digital age/when I have Google*/in such a bad economy?" is going to get a real answer, and it's going to be full of stuff that will probably put you to sleep or make you want me to shut up, and I won't even be sorry, because You Guys Need To Stop Saying Stuff Like This To Me. I don't ask you why you still want to be a Mathematician when there are perfectly good calculators, or a Doctor when I could just use Web M.D., or a Butcher when so many people are becoming Pescatarians. Just let me have my dream.
I'm doing a lot more cane training, and I think it's helping me lose weight. I'm thinking of creating a workout program based on it. "You Cane Do It!: 30 Days to a Slimmer Shape, A Grossly Huge Forearm, and Awesome Seats On The Bus"
*Google may heretofore be mentally replaced by the word Bing, if you're a Mouthy.